On my recent trip from home to Faridabad, I noticed something absolutely fascinating and fantastic about India. It’s very apparent and conspicuous but often goes unheeded. Or maybe all you smart people out there have taken a note of it. Let’s put it this way- I was getting utterly bored and hence, tried to interest myself with this pseudo-intellectual activity.
The smallest of the small shops in India are very aptly and fancily named. The first one to grab my eye-balls was ‘D-sant’ hair dressers. Though it’s difficult guessing what made me notice it- the relevance in the name or the spelling catastrophe, nevertheless, I was impressed by the fact that an illiterate barber knows what ‘decent’ means. I just wish his salon isn’t running in loss considering the count of people who actually look ‘d-sant’ (or want to look so) in India.
The next in line was ‘woofer-amplifier’ music store. He was also playing the chartbuster song with precisely these words in it on an ear-piercing volume. Hats off to the guy’s marketing skills !!!
Then came ‘Perfect fit’ tailors. Agreed it looks lifted from the ‘Shahrukh Mayur Khan’ ad but isn’t Anu Malik making crores doing the same thing. Shahrukh was also the brand ambassador of his dim-lit, dilapidated shop. His huge, smiling picture welcomed his customers every day.
’16 Forever’ beauty parlour was the next to pass-by and I don’t have even a shadow of doubt about the owner’s annual turn-over. Don’t be shocked if you see this dingy little parlour located in a congested street of Ballabgarh (our Las Vegas!!) emerging out as the greatest threat to VLCC.
Thereafter, many such perfectly named shops went by. ‘Figure fine’ gym, ‘Mishthi’ paan bhandaar, ‘Comfort’ shoe store- to name a few. However, the name of one particular factory made me suppress a laugh. It was ‘Sheel manure and fertilizers’. How did these people get to know Dr. Sheel was obsessed with bullshit? For all those who couldn’t follow- Dr. Sheel was one of our qualified teachers who found everything we said a pile of animal excreta.
India indeed is incredible. No wonder Indians are the people with the highest IQ. I now feel like asking Steve Jobs…err…Tim Cook what made them name their company ‘Apple’??